Everything I ever needed to know about love I learned from Mel Abraham
*disclaimer: I am about to butcher a beautiful love story because it is not my own, sorry Mel.
Picture this. Woman meets man in a gym while in California for a conference. These two really hit it off, it’s love at first sight. They make plans, they expose their feelings, they skype, they to go to another conference together, despite the ocean between them; it’s a real Rick Blaine and Ilsa Lund in Paris kind of thing. There’s a cool car, exotic locations, and long passionate kisses and everything. *go watch Casablanca and come back if you need to.
This is, well, bliss. Soulmates have been found! Like, you’ve been looking for someone your whole life and then there they are, right in front of you! And you even introduce them to your sister. (If you knew my sister, you would know what a big deal this is!)
I bet you’ve guessed this story is about me and someone I met in a gym, and you are right.
So about Mel Abraham. If you don’t know him; google him. He’s a business badass and just about the nicest guy on earth. I know this because I met him in a hallway at a fitness event and he is just incredibly kind. Anyhow, back to the story, it’s Sunday at the conference, I’m there with my soulmate, and Mel gets up to speak.
Mel tells the story about meeting his wife (see above disclaimer) and I’m not sure why because it’s a business conference, but it’s the most amazing love story ever. He sees the woman of his dreams in an airport and her reaction is decidedly not like Ilsa Lund in Casablanca. She’s kind of thinking, who is this weird guy? He just decides right then and there that she is the one and he does everything super romantic and gentlemanly to win her heart. Does it matter to him that she’s really not impressed with his advances, or that he just met her in an airport, or that she lives across the country, and that none of it makes sense? Of course not, because Mel Abraham is a badass! He understands the one thing about love; none of that shit matters. How will we work it out? When will I see you? Who is going to move? Blah, blah, blah.
Yup, you guessed it. They got married.
So, my soulmate next to me then says, he just bought two tickets to Mel’s next conference and will I go with him? Well, hell yeah I will. With you baby, I will go anywhere!
I bet you can guess the next part too; we never went.
Because people go home and realize all the shit they will have to do to make things workout; selling things, getting a new jobs, saying good byes and it all seems too much. Most people are not like Mel, they think things like houses, jobs, grandma’s dishes, and motorcycles actually mean something.
It’s not a war that keeps lovers apart but inconvenience.
What I know, and maybe what Mel knows, that at the end of our days we ask ourselves; “Did I live with all my heart, did I take risks to live my life fully, did I love my friends and family tremendously and without restraint, was I true, was I good, did I do what I was meant to do?”. I saw my dad ask himself these questions when he was dying and I remember them every single day. This taught me; only love matters.
So, like a movie, this story has an end. For months I have been afraid. I know what I will do if he appears again, unexpectedly, like that moment when Rick sees llsa sitting at that table in Rick’s Cafe. I will leave with him. No matter who I am with, what or who I have to lose, I will follow him, I will do that Ilsa thing and crush those who love me.
And I hang on.
But today when my lover contacts me out of the blue, I remember Mel Abraham. And I know, I deserve someone like Mel. My very own Mel. Someone who doesn’t let the little things get in the way of being with me, because yes, I am worth that much. Someone who is willing to risk for me all that I would risk for him.
So, I instead of being Ilsa, I pull a Rick. I take him to the runway. Get on that plane lover, without me, and don’t look back. Fly away to your future and I will fly away to mine, just don’t forget;
We will always have Paris, or Venice Beach.